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Celebrating what it means to be a woman

Updated: Oct 20, 2019

A few days ago, was International Women’s day. However, we all know that every day, is women’s day, whether you’re local or International, because as women we are members of the human species, the most beautiful, most splendid, most creative of all living beings on the planet. This is not only because of how we look, it is because we are the only species who can create things and influence our reality, through our thoughts. Everything we see in our world was created through thought. The phone or computer you are reading this from, the building you sit in, everything first begins with thought.

Our Thoughts are pure energy. It is the purest form of energy in existence, it leaves our bodies and heads out into the world and into the universe, extending, forever. Our thoughts last for ever. When we express our thoughts, that is when we speak it out or write it down, we give it added energy, we increase its vibration and therefore, it’s creative power. Every thought we ever have, ever had, or ever will have is creative. It will create something. It must, that is its purpose. Our thoughts impact every aspect of our lives, our health and wellness, our wealth and success and all our relationships. It determines who we bring into our lives and what they bring to us. What our thoughts create, depends on whether it is a thought of love or a thought of fear. Fear is the opposite of love, we have been taught that the opposite of love is hate, it is not. It is fear. Our fear not only impacts our lives, it impacts our world and creates natural and man-made disasters of epic proportions.

I wake up at 4am, the wind is howling at my window. Something is wrong. It is as if the earth is in pain. She is sick, she is trying to tell someone. No one is listening. She is vomiting, her stomach hurts, her head aches. The cells of her body are dis eased. She cannot decide whether she is freezing or whether she is burning. Her body is quaking, volcanoes are erupting around her. She is crying until her soil is drenched. She is throwing tantrums, moving things out of her way, screaming in pain. No one can hear. We pretend, we cannot see, and we continue day after day. I got out of bed. I asked, what can I do? Because I felt her pain. I felt it every twenty-eight days, and I felt it then. And she laughed at me. Do, she said, there is nothing to do. You simply need to be. Be happy, be a woman, celebrate women, celebrate life. I feel what you feel. When you are sad and afraid, I am sad and afraid. When you cry, I cry. When you are in pain, I am in pain. When you throw a tantrum, I throw a tantrum. You want to help me? Be happy. Be a woman. Celebrate women. Celebrate life.

As I sat there, 4am, 5am, 6am. Tears began to stream down my face, because I realise that I had been so busy, I had been so afraid, that I had forgotten what it meant to be a woman. This fear had been passed down for generations, centuries, eons, from the beginning of time, from the first woman. The first woman who defied the rules laid down by man, by society, by culture by religion. The rule said, “don’t eat that fruit, because the day you eat that fruit, you shall know good from evil.” And she defied it. She did not accept the status quo. She did not believe what she was told. She saw that the fruit was good, it was pleasant to the eye, so she ate. And the day she ate, her eyes were opened. She became enlightened. She realised she was a Goddess. She understood the power of her thoughts. She knew the difference between good and evil. And she saw that there was no evil, because when it all came down to it, when all the lies and illusions had been stripped away, there was only love, unconditional love, peace and joy. And so, being a woman, being honest, selfless, kind and loving, she shared with her husband. And he ate.

And his eyes too, were open, and he too, saw that good and bad existed. But he focused on the bad. He saw that he was naked, and he became afraid. He attacked the woman, he accused her, he even accused God. He said, “God, see, that woman you gave me to be my wife, she gave me this fruit.” Then he became petrified, because now, he too understood the power of thought, he understood the power that he had as a human being. Fear is an energy, and it is as contagious as any disease. So, the woman became afraid. She thought, God’s going to punish me. So, she punished herself. She left the garden, where there was no nine to five, where her meals were fruits and vegetables and fish gathered from the streams, where her days were spent in contemplation of nature, basking in the warmth of the sun and sleeping under the stars. And she began to toil, working hard, Pressing for Progress, and for three days a month she bleeds, because she knows she has forgotten what it means to be a woman, a Goddess, half of the divine whole.

This version of the woman has become the status quo, the way things are, a societal, religion and cultural rule laid down by man. We have accepted that we are inferior, and we have believed it. We are less, so we must stand behind and not besides man. And rather than changing the way we think, create a New Thought, we have sort to change the things our thoughts create. So, we form organisations to fight for equality in the work place, we form groups to stop the sexual abuse of the woman, and even though we are on the verge of being replaced by Bundara version 2.0, we resist a new idea, a different concept, a New Thought Movement. But every condition existing in our lives and in our world is created by who and what we think we are.


Then I came here. Every woman said, “Black women don’t get jobs here, its care work and minimum wage.” I did not believe it. But it’s never about whether you believe the thought or not, it is whether you receive it. We are constantly exchanging thoughts with each other, the thought gets lodged in your etheric body, your psyche, and as you begin to receive more thoughts of a similar nature, they attach to that thought and they begin to grow, take root and they begin to form “matter” in your life. So, I became afraid. And my fears began to create my life experiences, it began to influence the people around me and how they reacted to me.

One night I defied the thought. On a whim my husband and I sat, and we applied for a job at Lloyds, not accounts, telephone banking. I got the job. It was awesome. They made some beautiful pasta salads with shrimp in the canteen, fresh soup and hot loaves you could buy at lunch for a few pence. It was awesome. Every Friday, my husband would pick me up and we would accompany my team who had been in training with me to the pub. I was proper Irish. so I was!

Then the thoughts which had been planted began to take root, they began to form clumps and they began to matter. Because everywhere I looked, black women were doing care work and we were earning minimum wage. And so, at the end of probation, I realise I had not studied the folder the bank had given me, so a job I could do with my eyes closed, had been doing for years, calling holiday companies all over the world to collect money, I could not do. So, I went back to my comfort zone, I became part of the group, I accepted the status quo. I got a stitching job, earning minimum wage. This fear did not limit itself to my wealth and success, it affected my health and wellness and my relationships.

So, when this woman came into my life, at first, I thought, we could be great friends. I was never one for best friends, at school I would have my click, my group, my followers. At work, I would have a close friend who I would keep in touch with. But you will hear Oprah Winfrey talk about Gail this, and Gail that, I never had a Gail. So, I thought this will be my Gail, she was funny, she dressed nice, we could discuss things and argue for hours, I could walk into her house anytime and she the same. We loved the same music and we could put on YouTube and carry our own keys for hours. But my fears would not let me. If I knew I was afraid, I would have done something about it. But I did not know. Most of the world, and so many of us women, are blissfully unaware that we are living in fear. We think, this is the natural way, the normal way. It is the furthest thing from natural.

So, rather than being a friend, seeing the good in her, I blamed her for everything. What was not my husband’s fault, was her fault. Just as man, in the depth of fear accused the woman, made her the cause of all his problems, I made my sister, my friend, a villain. I looked around and saw all the bad I had created in my life, but I did not want to take responsibility, I needed someone to blame, I needed to be the hero, so I made her, the villain.

Then one day, I woke up. I took a bite of that fruit, I defied the status quo, I refused to follow the rules, I created New Thought, a New Thought Movement, a movement that enabled me to accept full responsibility for my life and all my experiences. A movement which holds me accountable for the experiences of my friends, my sisters, and the experience of every woman.

So today, I celebrate what it means to be a woman. And I say I am sorry, to women of every colour, every class, every creed and every nation for all the experiences we have had as women, which we have co created as a species.

To my villain, who was never a villain, but a sister and a friend. I say I am sorry.

When I said, let us form an army’s wife group and you said, “Let me see that.” Instead of hearing criticism, judgment, letting my fears get the better of me and shelving my ideas, I should have learnt that being a woman, means not always needing to be the centre of attention or the leader. That a woman can stay in the background, support her sister and still shine.

When I sat in your living room and tears filled your eyes, because you needed a bus ticket. And rather than offering the coins in my pocket, I went to the Naffi to buy junk. Even when you pointed it out and the tears streamed down your face, instead of criticising you, complaining and telling everyone who would listen, I should have learnt that being a woman means, not waiting to be asked, but offering help when it is needed. It means being there for each other during the struggles but being willing and able to celebrate each other’s success.

When you asked me if I thought the world revolved around me, instead of saying no, then desperately trying to convince myself, while trying to take over your world, wondering why can’t she see I want the best for her, I am acting in her best interest, I know that, why doesn’t she, she needs to see things my way, I am doing this for her. I should have learnt that being a woman, means your world revolves around you. But so, does your sisters, and your friends. Every woman’s world, revolves around her. When you moved right next to me, instead of meditating for peace, and tolerance and avoiding you, I should have been over the moon. I should have welcomes you, loved you unconditionally and thank God for another chance to represent what it meant to be a woman.

When I met you at the airport and you told me your sad story, instead of listening silently, because finally, my deepest thoughts had become my reality. Because while I prayed for a loving heart and asked God to bless you, my deepest thoughts were, God if you could just make my life a little bit better than hers, if you could just bless me just a tad bit more. And Instead of continuing to listen and thinking, how could you be so stupid to get yourself in that mess, you see, you should have read my book, you should have been part of my group, you should have been my friend. I should have learnt that being a woman means showing compassion. I should have said, I am sorry, what can I do.

As we Press on for Progress, form organisations, begin movements, come together in groups, it is essential that we not forget what it means to be a woman. Being a woman, means being fearless. It means knowing that you are the creator and director of your life, you decide who comes in to it and what experiences they bring to you. Being a woman, is knowing that the fault you see in another woman, is a fault that exist in you. It is about supporting each other and not competing with each other. It is about being compassionate and loving, not judging and criticising. Being a woman is about going back, rewinding the sands of time, rewriting history, creating New Thought, going back to being Goddesses, when our eyes were open, and we had knowledge of the difference between good and evil. It’s about once again, standing besides man and not behind him. Being a woman is about knowing you are one with God and not separate from it. It’s about getting back to a life of joy, peace and harmony with nature. It is imperative that we get back to being women. Because it is not by what we do, but by who we are, can we heal the earth. It is by healing the woman, healing her soul, then healing the rift between the man and the woman, only then, shall the earth be healed.

Joyce New Thought Movement UK

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