The day my book of life opened
Updated: Oct 20, 2019
My name is Joyce. I was born in the Caribbean Island of Dominica, known as the nature Island, with its unique three hundred and sixty-five rivers. I grew up in St. Lucia, said by Oprah Winfrey to be a must visit before you die. I moved to Northern Ireland in 2010. By 2013, my life was a disaster on all levels, financially, emotionally and career wise. I found myself working in a factory, making peanuts, constantly feeling as if, I had let myself down, I could do better, but I was not. My marriage was in shambles, the honeymoon was long over. My husband had found his long-desired parenthood outside of marriage. We were six feet in debt. The gambling and alcoholic hobbies were now serious business. I was a mess. So, I decided, to fix my husband. I did not speak to him for twenty-one days. At the end of twenty-one days I realise, you cannot fix people, and, the only person that really needed to be fixed, was me. I apologised to my husband, but during that period, I was fixed. I had found the internet and YouTube. On YouTube was Oprah Winfrey’s Super Soul Sunday, Soul to soul and Iyana Vanzant’s fix my life. I had cried more than I had ever cried before. I had found myself. And my life began to change. On Saturday the 8th of March 2014, after taking my daughter to a school activity, I suddenly had the feeling that “this is it”. I was done raising my daughter. She was on her way and nothing would prevent her from achieving her goals. All I had to do now was taxi her too and throw, provide her spending money and enjoy the ride. This simple thought changed my life. Before that day, I never had money to give my daughter, even when I got paid, I either had no change, or something would come up. From that day I always had money to give her. When I got home that day, it was as if my book of life had opened. And I was not being judged, but I was being given an opportunity to review my life. Though we are always thinking, every second of every minute of every day, only a handful of our thoughts, determines the course of our lives. And I saw every thought that had brought me to exactly where I was in life. I saw the thoughts that had brought me failure and success in life. I saw that my first attempt at a juice business had failed, because I thought I needed my friends to support my ideas and dreams. I saw that my real estate business had failed, because I had listened to a stranger’s definition of me, and had given in to my need for security, over pursuit of passion. I saw that my restaurant had failed, because I did not want to be “told” what to do, and thought taking advice was me losing control and independence. And I saw the exact day and time where this intense need to be independent and self-sufficient was created. It was the day I visited my dad for the first time after fifteen years, he insisted on giving me money to pay for a glass of breadfruit or plantain punch, a young man had made for me. I had decided then and there that I would never depend on a man, but I would always be able to take care of myself. That thought, plagued every relationship I had with the opposite sex, leading to the eventual destruction of my marriage. I saw the deep-seated thought of me blaming my mother for years of neglect, for my lack of success had been wasted energy. I saw that she was not to be blamed, that there was a reason and a purpose, behind my solitary upbringing. I saw the exact day when I was eight years old and I created the thought “I do not have a toothache” in the midst of severe pain, had resulted in me not having a toothache since then, even though I was the prime candidate for it. I saw the thought of me wishing for my husband to have the baby he so longed for, resulted in exactly that. I saw everything. I saw my life. And I saw that there was no God punishing me, or rewarding me, but I was creating it all. Through my thoughts I was choosing the life and times I was experiencing, and I saw that everyone else was doing the exact same thing. We were all unconsciously having thoughts, which was creating the lives that we were experiencing. So, I decided to change my thoughts, and my life changed. On that day the book would not close, the record would not stop playing. I felt an intense truth, I could be a writer, a poet, or anything I could imagine. I thought, “I need paper,” but it was Saturday and I had to clean the house. As soon as I had that thought the book closed, the record stopped playing. I felt bereaved, empty as if a great gift had been taken away. I woke up the next morning and for the first time in my life I could not see past my window. The fog was as dense as a blanket. Then it started again. The record started to play, the book opened, this time, I decided I would write. I used my phone and sent messages to every woman in my WhatsApp contact list. Every time an inspiration began to play in my head, a scenario, a memory that could heal someone or heal me, I sent it out. Once I sent it out, it stopped. And so, after three months I realise I had written and published my first book, I called it Phenomenal Women. I had become phenomenal. I had become a writer. And I recognised that all women are created phenomenally. Our thoughts not only create our lives, it creates the world around us. It influenced the people we attracted to us, our parents, our partners, our children, our friends, our foes. Everyone we brought into our lives, came in answer to our deepest thoughts about ourselves. I realised that my husband came into my life because of my deep thoughts of taking care of myself. I realised that a staunch rival had come into my life because of my deep-seated thought that people were talking about me, she fulfilled that thought to perfection. I realised that my thoughts of fear had created diseases and that by changing my thoughts I was able to heal myself. I found out how deeply connected we were to the whole universe. How through meditation we could completely clear up the sky and create intricate cloud patterns. I realised how connected we were to plants, water, and every living thing on the planet. I realised that thoughts traversed the universe at the speed of light and can create amazing co incidences and synchronicity. I realise that nothing was independent of itself, but all was connected, and one thing influenced the other and all things could be changed through changing of thought. I realise that this knowledge could change the lives of millions and change the world we are experiencing, into the world we all dreamed of. A world that was free of diseases, where people realised that all illnesses, were self-created, that illnesses could be healed simply by changing the mind. A world where we could eliminate hunger and poverty through compassion, sharing, and taking responsibility for each other. A world where war was a thing of the past, because we all recognised that peace, was an internal thing, and true power was not power over others, but power from within. A world where we knew with utter certainty, that what we did to another, we did to our self. Because, we are all one. A world where words such as racism, sectarianism, islamophobia, homophobia, were all things of the past, because we recognised that the right to be, was a birth right, ingrained in the human psyche. A world in which we knew, with gut level certainty, that God, was a personal thing, an internal thing, unique to each human being, and it was that thing, that connected us to each other and to everything in the whole universe. A world in which we knew that we were eternal. It was not an illusion, not an imagination, but a real possibility. It became my life’s purpose, my reason for existing. It became a movement. A new Thought Movement. A movement towards a world of joy, peace, and love. A movement towards a world where we take full responsibility for our lives, using the power of our minds to change our world for the better. A movement towards change.
Because: “It is time for change, and change begins with you!”
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